#26 Forever Alone?

My best friend Souther is unique in every possible way. She's quirky; she's loud; she'll do anything you dare her to do; she loves hard, and she feels even harder. She's pretty much my polar opposite, but that's why I love her so much. I've always thought we compliment each other well. She's there to tell me not to freak out about school because it isn't the end of the world if I get a B, and I'm there to tell her not to freak out when she breaks up with a boyfriend because there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Trust me, there have been many times that this has happened - on both ends. I think the most important thing I've learned from Souther in the past six years I've known her is the importance of bouncing back from anything bad that happens to you. I've seen her go through many heartbreaks and disappointments, but she always manages to push through and be a better Souther when it's all said and done. No matter what happens, you can always bounce back. I asked her to write a piece for my blog about what she wishes she would've done - or I suppose in her case it would be what she wouldn't have done - and she came back with amazing words about being in a relationship. Like I said before, I've taken from Souther that it's important to bounce back, and I can tell you for certain that she's bounced back from all that she mentions below. Keep that in mind. Even if you feel like your world is coming to an end because your relationship is ending or because you haven't been in a relationship at all, you can always bounce back. And without further ado, meet Souther:


When I was asked to do a feature for this blog, I wasn't quite sure what to write about so I figured I'd write about the only thing I know. Relationships. 


In high school, people can sometimes feel the pressure to be in a relationship or at least be talking to someone. People settle for less than they deserve just because they think they need someone else to make them happy. Well to all the "forever alones" out there, let me just say I admire you. I admire you for not settling, for not giving in to the pressure, and for still being happy. 


I have gone through more pointless and ridiculous relationships than I can even count, and I regret most of them. I wish with all of my heart that I could say I've never been kissed or that I've never been on a date. I know now that I rushed into things way too young. Waiting for something is the best part. On an episode of How I Met Your Mother, one of the characters says that the lead up to a kiss is even better than the kiss itself. I think that's true, and I wish so badly that I could go back and tell my 12-year-old self not to kiss that boy at his front door. So, sticking with the things I should've done theme, here is my feature: the boys I shouldn't have dated. (I know all my friends are going to laugh at that one.)


1. The guy from the cruise ship. 
2. The guy in sixth grade who gave me a cool necklace. 
3. The guy I broke up with my first love for. 
4. The guy who played my dad in a musical.
5. The guy that wanted me to make out backstage during a musical.
6. The guy who was a senior who led me on when I was a freshman. (We never dated, but he took up most of my time anyway.)
7. The guy I met at church camp who lived six hours away. 
8. The guy I dated in band for two weeks. 
9. The guy who was my ex-boyfriend's best friend.
10. The guy I met at work who I thought I was in love with.


Not all of my ex-boyfriends are up there, and that's because I don't regret all of them. Some of my relationships meant something, and I will always look back on them fondly. But if I could go back and do it all again, I would. 


So who cares if you're a high school graduate and you've never been kissed? Who cares if you've never told a girl you like her? Don't rush it. Good things come to those who wait. So just wait for the right one. You could be 18, 25, or even 90 and have not met "the one" yet. But trust me, they're out there, so just hold on. And remember, you can't be loved unless you first love yourself.